february 2013 - October 2014

October 2014

 (Dear Vywamus),

I’ve been speaking to angels and guides for some time, I try to meditate regularly, I have much I’m grateful for – yet I’m still overshadowed by fear, negativity, intolerance and impatience. Does anyone hear me? Please help me to understand what I need to do differently. Thank you.


Dear Ann,

It is some months since you wrote your question, and I and other guides with me have been following you closely, sending you dreams that could be helpful, and putting people and events in your way that could help lead you out of the stage of frustration you express in your email. Many other readers of this page are in either a similar stage of frustration on their path, or may eventually come to it. Sometimes for a long period it may seem to you that you are flying solo, and though you may believe we are there, you may not be able to feel it. Often we let you make your way through this difficult patch for a while, and give you the opportunity to discover on your own what to do. This has been the case with you, and I would like to commend you. You have done well in being in touch with the higher energies, and in persevering on your path. You have taken some steps since you wrote, yet we guides are aware that you still have some areas where you could use help. So we have some additional suggestions for you.

For you and other readers who feel that they have made some progress but are still struggling with negativity in one form or another, my first recommendation is that you do all you think you can do, all that you are inspired to do, and then surrender. At that point, just give in, accept, allow, and surrender to the feeling of frustration, incompleteness, not knowing what to do, or what to try to do to get through this stage. As far as you are able, come to terms with, be at peace with, the present situation, which is that you are not yet where you want to be. Practice being at peace with that and not striving to be somewhere else.

Now while you are working on this surrender, many emotions will naturally come up. Some of these will be emotions related to beliefs and life issues that have been blocks on your path. It will be helpful if you can welcome these emotions. So if fear or sadness or anger or judgment of self or other feelings come up while you are trying to surrender to the present moment, don’t ignore them or try to get rid of them. Surrender to the fear, sadness, anger, or judgment. Accept it. Feel it and be with it in your heart and in your body. You don’t have to fight with it. See if you can learn how it began.

Any emotion that comes to you, no matter how negative it seems, arose from some positive purpose within you. It may have been to defend yourself, to keep you safe from being hurt or criticized, or for any number of other reasons. Before you can move on, it is essential to find the positive kernel or purpose in the midst of the negative feeling and acknowledge and appreciate it.

It is also important to recognize the limiting beliefs that are the source of your negative emotions. These beliefs may have been formed very early in your learning about the world, and while they may have been useful then, they may not be now, and may in fact be blocking your progress.

For more detail on how to work with limiting beliefs and the negative emotions that go with them, look on this ASK VYWAMUS page for the letter to Wendy on 7-23-13. While she is working on the issue of doubt, the steps I suggest there can work equally well applied to the fear, negativity, intolerance and impatience you describe – and indeed to any other negative emotions that come up.

Please remember also, as I so often remind all of you, these negative emotions and blocks you encounter are not “detours” on your path – they are your path. When you can accept them as such and work with them, they become powerful movers that propel you along toward the purpose, peace, and joy that are your true destiny in this earth life.

In the midst of all this, and for all other readers as well, at whatever stage of your path you find yourself, be sure that I and other guides and teachers are always with you. Do call on us whenever you wish!



October, 2014

(Dear Vywamus)

So assuming this is you not someone else using your name. What do you think of the whole mike brown shooting and Ferguson riots? How's it make you feel? 

Thanks Nikolai.

Dear Nickolai,

Yes, it is indeed myself, Vywamus, channeled through Andrea Seiver. And your question is very apt, very appropriate for your present day experience. Ferguson, Missouri, is only one of the events involving violence and victimization which come to your attention every day. Such events are widespread in all your societies on earth, in some more than others. At this stage of your evolution, because of worldwide reporting, you are all becoming increasingly aware of such events and are increasingly reacting against such violence. Many of you are becoming much more sensitized to such violence and moved to try to prevent it. In the broader perspective, such events are teaching events at the national and world level. The higher purpose, whether the participants are conscious of it or not, is to hold up a truthful mirror to your society so that you see certain aspects of yourselves. Only then can you choose to make changes.

Believe it or not, all this is a sign of humanity's progress and evolution -- not the violent events themselves, but your changed reactions to them. A generation or two ago, an event such as the shooting of an unarmed African American boy by police would not have brought about such widespread indignation and outrage. It would have been taken for granted that such things occur, and only a few would have paid much attention. .It would have been the same for violence or injustice toward other minorities -- women, Hispanics, Jews, Muslims, gay people, and so on. In the past, it would have been seen as a matter of course.

So, in one sense, this event and your reactions are already signs that you are evolving beyond that previous perspective and into a more compassionate and egalitarian approach. We at this level are encouraged by your progress, but quite aware that you have a way to go. We cannot interfere and “rescue” you from the learning that your experience of such events can provide. We can and do give you our love, support, and guidance.

Here I want to remind you of 2 things: First, in this stage of human evolution, many of your previous institutions and old forms of doing things are breaking down and no longer as effective as they used to be.: in education, religion, economics, the family, and many other areas, you are seeing a breakdown of the forms that used to work for you. This is a growth period for your species, and like all times of growth, full of turbulence. The breakdown of all these old forms, which are not large enough to work for you any more, often leads to a release of uncontrolled or “wild” energies which can no longer be contained or held in check by the old forms. Some of what is released are pure creative energies, and some are energies that you experience as negative -- fear, anger, pain, and so on. And until you begin to develop new, larger forms to hold and express these wild energies, you will probably feel that things are getting worse than they ever were. And it may seem overwhelming. But there is hope.

Now secondly, I also remind you that the problem of violence, and indeed any other major problems which beset you at this time, can never be solved at the level where they are generated. You must always go to a higher level for the solution. And humans are evolving into a higher level of consciousness, where you will be creating new forms, and new approaches to the problems that plague you today. I have discussed this period of turmoil for humanity, and its eventual resolution, more fully in my book The Next Big Bang: The Explosion of Human Consciousness.

In general, in a situation like that in Ferguson, the evolved approach would not be to take sides, though your empathy may certainly be on one side or the other. Rather, it would rather be to begin by taking both sides -- to understand with mind and heart what each party in such a violent event has experienced, their motivation, their flaws and vulnerabilities, etc. Only with such a deep understanding can you then jointly create a new form in which you address the root causes for the conflicts that lead to violence and find ways to bring justice, and to prevent or resolve such events in the future.

To sum up, the incidents in Missouri, and the many other instances of violence in your society to which you are exposed, are sensitizing you and goading you to find new ways to deal with such volatile situations. This takes time, of course.

Hopefully you will be one of the "pioneers" bringing a new consciousness to the world's experience of such events, and working on new approaches. I assure you that I and the other guides who work with humanity on these world scale problems are always there to help you with insight and inspiration, and also by bringing those of you who are trying to create new forms into contact with others of like mind, so that you can work together and have the joy of each other’s company on your path.



October 2014

Dear Vywamus,

I was told that the Universal Laws are changing. Is that correct?

Love to you,

Dear Morgan,

The answer to your question is no and yes, depending on how you look at it. The Universal Laws don't change, they are eternal and already contain all that they will ever contain. However, you may experience them as changing, partly because your understanding of them is expanding and getting deeper.

The other reason you may experience the Universal Laws as changing is that, while these Laws are eternal, yet in the physical worlds in all realities, they are always unfolding into their inherent potentials. As humanity and the earth itself evolve and become more and more open to the influences of the higher nonphysical energies, the manifestation of the Universal Laws here will be broadening. So eventually you will see physical manifestations of things that now seem impossible on the physical plane – that is, things that seem to be against the Universal Laws (as you currently understand them). But the Laws include all potential, not just what is actually physical in your world today. These future “impossible” manifestations I speak of are possible, because the Laws are always unfolding as part of the Divine Play, and are infinitely adaptable.




(Dear Vywamus,)

I have just started learning about the universe and vibration. My problem is faith and trust. I have neither. How do I fix this? I trust no one. Believe in nothing I can’t see with my eyes.


Dear G.,

Of course, the first thing you will have to do here is decide whether you can trust what I have to say. Perhaps you could take my response as a working hypothesis that may be true, and which can be tested by following my suggestions and observing the results.

Since you mention learning about the universe and vibration, I am assuming you are primarily asking about how to know and trust in the energies beyond the physical senses and beyond the mind. You say you trust what you can see with your eyes, and I assume you mean also that you trust anything you can verify with your physical senses. You probably also trust anything you can arrive at by your reasoning. And I also assume that you trust your own experience. That is an excellent place to start!

My first advice is, don’t believe in or trust anything you don’t experience for yourself. Anything else is merely a hypothesis. You can, however, actually widen your capacity for experience. I will speak more about that in a little bit.

For now, let us go back in time to when you as an infant began to develop trust in using your own eyes, and in using your other senses. Back then, you were aware of visual stimuli coming in through your eyes from the outside world. At first, of course, these had no clear meaning for you, though you probably enjoyed seeing color or movement. Very quickly these separate visual sensations organized themselves into visual images that involved color and shape, and sometimes movement. And soon you also began to notice that other sensations happened at the same time as the visual image.

For example, perhaps someone shook a brightly colored rattle in front of you, and it caught your interest. Suppose you then reached out and touched it. Later you might also learn to grasp it and bring it up to explore with your eyes and mouth. So here you have sight, sound, touch and taste all becoming parts of your experience of the rattle. AS you had more experiences with the rattle you would remember them, and the next time you saw it you would expect the same visual, auditory, taste and touch cues. You would develop a sense of trust that when you saw the rattle, it would make sound when shaken, it could be touched and grasped and brought close, tasted, and so on.

Now, just as in infancy you learned from experience to trust what you could see with your eyes, so you can learn to trust in the existence of a greater Reality beyond the senses and beyond the mind, by experiencing it for yourself.

How do you have experiences of that which is beyond the mind and the senses? You need to learn to use your “inner senses” just as you learned to use your external physical senses. With enough practice you will become just as sure and trusting of what your inner senses perceive as you are of what your eyes can see.

To develop these inner senses you will need to turn inward, and since they are more subtle than the external senses, you will need to bring more attention and focus than you needed for the rattle. I would add that these inner senses are natural human abilities that are part of who you are, and with enough time and attention, many of you have been able to develop them.

There are a number of methods to use to develop your inner senses. You can find quite a few books that cover these methods for training yourself to perceive beyond the everyday world. The following is a simple exercise that may be helpful as a start. It gives you the opportunity to actually experience deep within yourself the higher frequencies (vibrations) that are beyond the senses and beyond the mind.


1. Be in a relaxed position in a quiet place.

2. Begin to notice all the sensations going through your body – warmth or coolness, the places where your clothing touches you, your breath, your heartbeat, and so on. Notice any sounds . Notice the light coming through your eyelids if your eyes are closed.

Say to yourself, I live in a physical body, I feel my sensations and my physical energy flowing through my body, coming and going, constantly changing…

My sensations continually change, yet I am always here. I have and live in a body, but I am not my body…

(Here pause for a time to experience what you have said.)

3. Next, notice your emotions, all the feelings that flow through you: happiness, sadness, anger, fear, and so on. Notice how your emotional currents and patterns constantly come and go, and move through you.

Say to yourself, I have emotions, and many different emotions flow through me, constantly changing. They come and go, yet I am always here. I have emotions – yet I am not my emotions…

(Here pause again to absorb what you have just said)

4. Next pay attention to all the thoughts that constantly pass through your mind. Notice your thoughts and thought patterns, as they constantly come and go, and come again….

Say to yourself, I have thoughts, mental patterns that move through me and constantly change. My thoughts come and go, but I am always here. I have thoughts, but I am not my thoughts…

(Pause again now to pay attention to what you have said.)

5. Now say to yourself, I have a body…I have emotions…I have thoughts.

But I am not my body, I am not my emotions, I am not my thoughts . They constantly come and go, but I am always here.

And if I am not my body, or my emotions, or my thoughts, then who am I?”

Here spend some time listening inwardly. Notice what happens within you when you ask yourself that last question. Who is the “I” behind the familiar daily sensations, emotions and thoughts?

Just receive whatever experiences come…And stay with this for a while.

Once you are in this place beyond sensation, emotion, and thought, you actually begin to experience within yourself the frequencies of the greater Reality beyond the senses. With practice you will come to trust that this reality is always present, below the surface of your everyday activities , that it is always in you, and you are always in it.

You can continue to use this exercise or other methods to find and explore the greater Reality beyond the mind and senses. As you do this, you can automatically develop a sense of trust, based on your own experience.

We guides and teachers and guides do not at this time ask that you take anything we say on faith (which is believing in or trusting something or someone without the evidence of your own experience). Rather, as I said earlier, be open minded, but take everything that comes along as a hypothesis until you test it with your own experience.

Yes, in certain situations you may make an error by doing this, especially if your experience is incomplete. But as you go along this way you will also develop a trust in your own process of experiencing, and begin to realize that if errors occur, you will eventually, again through your own experience, correct them, and find your way again to the truth.

Enjoy your explorations,



 Dear Vywamus,
I have been diagnosed with “burn-out”. What will be the best and easiest way for me to recoperate and get back in balance again? Also I am very tired..no, uninterested and unhappay in my job situation. I work as a counselor/psychotherapist in a psychiatric outpatient clinic. I really can’t stand listening to their problems any more. I need some guidance to get my life on track again.

Thank you!


Dear Lena,

Because of your training and experience, there will be many things I say here that you already know. I will say them anyway to round out the picture for other readers. And hopefully as you read, you will be open to receiving my guiding energy and support, and perhaps find new insights even among these familiar concepts.

You are not alone. Burnout happens to many of you, whether on the job or in other situations. And as I will mention later, your burnout as an individual is also part of a larger collective experience that all of humanity is going through at this time.

I define burnout as psychological (and sometimes physical) exhaustion, brought on by being in a long term stressful situation where your resources are repeatedly drained without being sufficiently replenished. As you have noticed, it is marked by fatigue, loss of interest and enjoyment in life, sometimes a sense of helplessness or depression, and often by an underlying feeling of resentment.

To really understand burnout – what it means for you as an individual and what it means in the world -- we will need to look at it on more than one level. First there is the level of finding practical remedies for you as an individual with burnout. One solution, of course, could be to leave the situation itself – in this case, to move to a different work setting, or to leave this type of work for a different kind of work altogether. This may eventually turn out to be the right thing to do. Yet it may not immediately be possible or practical. And even if it is easy to do, such a change may not keep you from getting burnt out again, if you carry old patterns with you into a new setting.

Another solution might be staying in the work place where you are and paying much more attention to self care of all kinds. That might mean taking more days off, more vacations, possibly a leave of absence. It would definitely mean balancing your work hours with a richer and more restful and enjoyable life outside of work, with more time for fun and pleasurable relationships, better care of your body (rest, enjoyable exercise, etc,), making time to meditate, and perhaps time to get lost in a creative activity which has nothing to do with work.

Self care also means that during your working hours you find ways to maximize the aspects of your work that feel rewarding, and find ways to set limits so that you don’t find yourself trying to live up to unreasonably high expectations of how much you can do. You may even have the opportunity to get involved in reorganizing or changing some things at work so that it feels better to you to be there. This approach of making changes while staying in place may not be easy, especially when it comes to setting limits. Others (and you) will have come to expect a great deal of you and are used to your performing above and beyond your normal limit. When you begin to make changes, they will not applaud!

To make this kind of turnaround while staying in your present setting, you need courage, perhaps a degree of desperation, and some good help. It is essential to find a wise and good friend, or a therapist you trust, who will simply be with you through it all, and who may help you see options where you don’t see them.

It will also be important at this time to do some inner work, to look at old beliefs and patterns you have, such as trying to be perfect, or always putting others’ needs ahead of your own. Look at how they arose earlier in your life, how they may have contributed to your burnout, and how they might be transformed into patterns that work better for you. This inner work will in the end be very rewarding whether you remain in your particular work and work setting or leave. It will greatly increase your sense of well being wherever you are, and make it far less likely that you will get burnt out again.

Now, the practical remedies I have just described may be all you need, and are worth trying. However, for many of you it will be necessary and very helpful to go further and look at the deeper and broader meanings of your burnout.

Start with your own experience. You may see this as a time when you and everything in your usual world seem to be falling apart. Many of the things that used to work for you don’t work any more. Ways you had of easily coping with challenges don’t work as well – or not at all. What gave you pleasure or energy or motivation no longer does it for you. Your customary way of being in the world seems to be breaking down. On a personal level, this can be frightening – and frustrating.

What you are going through may be the beginning stages of a very profound transition in your life. Every change, large or small, involves first a breakdown of the old system, a falling apart of a form that no longer works. This falling apart is not a sign that you have failed, or should be trying harder. It’s a signal that you have moved forward on your path, and have grown so that the old ways of being/feeling/dealing with your environment no longer fit.

Now of course, there is loss involved here. No change occurs without some loss, and some gain. And you may mourn the old way’s passing, and what was good and familiar about it. This is natural. You may wish it would all go back to the way it used to be, which seems to have been much simpler. But the chicken can’t go back into the egg, and neither can you. The only thing to do is to accept that the eggshell is broken, and you are out.

What happens next? Well, for a while you may not know. It may not be clear at first what new way of being should take the place of the old one that has broken down. This is a time of incubation, where you go into the Void and don’t know how you will come out. You may feel you simply cannot keep up with your old job or setting, and have to reduce your time there, or take a leave of absence, or temporarily take a less important and demanding job where you can “putter” – even if it means temporarily less income.

During this incubation time, your best approach will be to be as present as you can in your daily life, present with the “nothing important going on,” present with your sensations, your feelings if you have any, and so on. Notice what things are important to you – or not. Don’t try to force yourself into doing something just because doing what seems to you to be nothing makes you anxious or impatient. Be with where you are. You will not be able to genuinely and reliably move on until you do so. And, if you find a form of meditation that works well for you, that will be helpful at this time.

Finally, make the effort to reach out for someone who can know you and be with you in exactly this space of “nothing going on.” Here is where that good friend or wise therapist can be very important. Incubating does not mean you have to be alone, and without caring support.

After a while – sooner if you have followed my suggestions – you will begin to see a new form emerging – a new way of being which fits you better. Perhaps you will find a new setting, or a new way of being in the old setting. Or something else entirely. Be alert for the new form. It will emerge at the right time, and you will recognize it because your energy will begin to come back.

Here you will want to keep your balance. If you jump into a new form too fast, it may still be too small for you and you may be shutting off something much more fulfilling. If you wait too long, your impulse to move forward may dwindle. In general, let your body and your heart be your guides, with only basic input from your mind. And as the new form develops, you will move into a more beautiful and expansive space than before, where things work for you again, but in a different way. Perhaps at that time – if not before – you will actually thank your “burnout” for forcing you out of the old way of being and into this much richer one.

Now, as we speak about the burnout stage in you as an individual, you may have realized that there is a much broader application. In your individual burnout, you are also part of a great movement of humanity, and many others are going through similar experiences in company with you. At this time in your history all of humanity is going through the kind of changes I’ve been describing in this letter. At a collective level, societies, economies, political systems, institutions, families and other forms no longer work for you as they did in the past. Most of these structures are falling apart as you outgrow them.

Many of you are reacting to these changes with anxiety and distress, or perhaps with the numbness and lethargy of burnout. You may be mourning the loss of old familiar forms, and anxious about the fact that in this void time of incubation there is much turbulence, but no real progress seems to be happening. This is natural and normal in such a time of change. And my advice to you collectively is the same as I gave earlier: Be with what is happening, accept that this is a time of falling apart and incubation, and, since all these stages overlap to some degree, be alert to recognize and allow room for the experimental new forms that are already emerging as humanity shifts to a new level of consciousness.

In the midst of all this, please know that we guides and teachers well understand the demands of the tasks you have undertaken in your time on earth. We are always with you, whether on the dull and rocky parts of your path, or on the easier and more enjoyable stretches. You may call on us wherever you are, and we will keep you company and bring you our loving support when you need it.



March 11, 2014

Having only recently heard of you, I wonder if you have made yourself known to me for a reason, and would love to hear from you. I am 80 years old, working on my I am presence and ascension, I would appreciate to hear from you, and would love some advise on my way forward, what I need to work on etc. in fact any advise would be much appreciated.

 Dear Shirley,

Yes, I have made myself known to you for a reason, because I wish to offer you my help in your personal spiritual work and also because you have a great deal of richness to share with others. I can help you with my support and energy in moving further into your work on the I AM state and connecting more with the spiritual energies, and with helping others to do the same.

I am writing this for you and for many in your age group. All of you have a special mission nowadays in the evolution of humanity. All of you are being asked to be channels to bring consciousness of the higher energies, the energies of Spirit, into the world. And you are asked to lead the way for other souls.

First, you say you are working on your I AM presence, which is another term for being in your deepest, largest Self, the place beyond space and time where you are one with the Infinite. This is indeed the primary mission of all of you, young and old, who have come into body on earth. At this stage of human evolution you are meant to consciously connect more and more with the energy of Spirit throughout your everyday life. And you are in the very stage of life at which that kind of work is most important and appropriate, and can come to greatest fruition.

At this time of your life, even though there are still practical problems and challenges in your everyday living, you probably have more chance to focus on the spiritual than you did before. You have fewer of the illusions and pressures and time constraints that may have gotten in your way earlier. So first, do spend time every day being with the energies of Spirit, in that I AM place – whether you get there through meditation, through reading, through listening to music that moves your spirit, through creative activities, through yoga or tai chi, through healing work, through simply practicing being very present in every moment – or in any other way that works for you. I have given some more specific steps for reaching the I AM level in Chapters 18-19 of my book The Next Big Bang.

After spending time in the I AM, be with these energies as much as possible throughout the day, be aware of them all around you and in yourself. You would not believe how helpful this is, not only for you, but for the evolving of all of humanity. When you are in your I Am level you have an energetic effect even when you are sitting alone in your home and not communicating to anyone. In this I AM place you have no limit of time or space, and so the effect of your resonating with the higher energies does have a powerful influence for the good on all of the human energy field. Being in the I AM, you have a tremendous impact.

So do continue with your own personal spiritual work, and if there are classes, guides, teachers, or groups who can help you with this, do find them. This work is not meant to be done in a vacuum. If, either in your everyday life or on the Internet, you find others who are also interested in moving into greater connection with Spirit, you can help each other a great deal and have much enjoyment in the process. And there are ways to do this whether or not you can get about easily.

This is a phase of your life where you have the opportunity to move into very new inner places and at the same time let go of some of the less important and less essential aspects of your life. To do this is normal. This is what happens when the beautiful flower that has enjoyed blooming in the sunshine stores up energy deep within, sheds its petals, and gets its seeds ready to go out on the wind to be planted. So you will be letting some of your energy and your learnings go out into the world, to spread far and near, and to spring up and be fruitful for people around you. This is a joyful process. Think of it as a dance where you have an inexhaustible supply of joy – flowers and fruits that you can share with everyone, and as you dance you let out into the world everything that you have learned and gleaned from your long life, many seeds to fall on fertile minds and hearts, and spring up and grow.

Now, in addition to sharing your I AM energy with all of humanity, many of you at this age have specific work you are invited to do out in the world. And, depending on your level of energy, your health, and your other circumstances, this work could take many possible forms. First, of course, you are already in the role of teachers and guides for the people around you --family and friends and others. By this time you have learned much about life and about what is really important, while others younger or less evolved are still struggling with many illusions or pressures that you do not have at this phase of your life. You are needed to give your love and compassion, and your wisdom, both practical and spiritual, to those around you. And it is important to do this whether or not anyone seems to “receive” what you give. Your love and compassion and your spiritual energy are always received immediately, whether acknowledged or not. The wisdom you offer may take a little longer! I think you know this already.

Another form of service you might undertake is to bring Spirit into the world by channeling. You – and many other readers – have the ability to channel me or other guides or your own higher self, and we welcome you to do this. On the Newsletter page of this web site we have given some guidelines on receiving guidance which will be useful for you and other readers who would like to let wisdom and inspiration from Spirit come through you in verbal form. Or, you may be moved to channel Spirit in the form of healing energy to others, or to channel in the form of creative energy -- art, music, craft, and so on.

In doing your work in the world, we guides would like to request that you focus especially on one neglected group – those of your own age. Elders in your culture often feel alone and isolated, beset by everyday practical problems, and often surrounded by family and friends who do not fully understand them. And, yours is an age group in which many have grown up spiritually impoverished, and/or had their spirituality confined in narrow religious views and rituals. Many at your age desperately need the broader perspective, peace of heart, consolation, and joy that comes from touching their I AM level. And they need the support and companionship of their peers.

You are one of the pioneers in an important movement of elders into their own I AM space. We encourage you to enter and spend time in the I AM space yourself, and to support others in your age group who may be dealing with physical and mental limitations, with changes in lifestyle and relationships, with losses, illnesses and death, to help them step aside from these tests and be uplifted into their own I AM space, where they can receive comfort and peace.

Helping more and more elders move into their I AM space may take many forms, and you are free to choose whichever you are most able and most moved to do. You can bring your I AM energy into traditional forms, such as volunteering in hospitals or hospice, helping out in places that offer services for seniors, visiting homes of the elderly, and so on. Just by doing this, you will be lifting up the energy in those environments. Or, you may be moved to simply share your experiences on the spiritual path at this phase of your life with others who seem receptive, and ask them about theirs. You can do this either in person, or in some other form.

If you’re fairly mobile, you might think about organizing a healing circle or a meditation group for elders in your own local area. One way this could be launched would be by bringing in a speaker on meditation, or spirituality, or yoga, or a healing practitioner, to a local senior center or a church – or by speaking yourself, if you have a mind to. From such events, interested parties might emerge who wish to pursue the exploration of Spirit in their lives. Then you could meet together and meditate, or use videos, audio recordings, music, yoga, and so on, and have discussion afterward.

As I mentioned before, you may learn to channel, and you might then be moved to share with others the inspiration and energy you receive, in whatever form that may be. If you write, and you are connected to the Internet, you may wish to share your writings there in emails to friends, or write a blog, or perhaps even create a web site especially for elders who are interested in exploring Spirit, and ways of integrating the energies of Spirit into their everyday lives. The Internet is a particularly helpful form to use if you are not able to get out and about easily, and helpful to others who might also be mostly homebound. And of course, when the Internet is not available, there is always the telephone.

The above are just a few possibilities I’m putting forth to spark your interest, certainly many others may occur to you. And, be aware that, in doing this work, it is not up to you to make sure that you help every elder you encounter to connect with Spirit. Some will be receptive to doing so, and some may have other lessons to learn before they can. You are simply meant to invite, and to share your own energy and experience and companionship.

To sum up, we guides see it as very important that you, and all of you at this age, have a balance in your life: enough alone time to go deeply inward and nourish your soul, and enough time helping and enjoying the company of each other on your spiritual path. You need both. Most of you are not meant to be hermits meditating alone in the wilderness, but rather social beings who share the path of life together, all the way to the end and beyond.

So we see you and those like you as adventurers together, inviting others to join you in the greatest adventure of all – the exploration of Spirit. When you keep that as your focus, you will find life after 80 – or 70, or 60 – can be joyful and expansive, and that you need not be overwhelmed by any limitations, burdens, and challenges that come along in everyday life. Always, no matter what, you have the joy of this adventure together, and our support in it. We guides and teachers are always with you. We are delighted to enjoy your company on this road and to give you our love and energy whenever you need them.



November 2013

Dear Andrea
This is my question:
I am stuck, fears "stories" running in my head, feeling lonely.
Please Vywamus help me.

Dear Gold,

You may be feeling sometimes overwhelmed by the fear and loneliness you describe, and whatever scenarios are going through your head. Oddly enough, though, having these feelings so strongly is a sign that at your deepest levels you feel ready now to address these issues which you have brought with you from other lives and also from past experiences in this life. All of you humans have such work to do in this and in every life, and the fact that these issues are coming up to the surface so often and so intensely is an indication that it is time to address them, and you are ready. This is good – though it may not be easy.

It is always better, and I recommend it to all of you, that when you experience such a degree of emotional pain and intensity, you seek the help of a kind therapist or wise and kind counselor to be there and give you support in facing these issues. You deserve to have someone at your side when doing this deep work. Of course, I and other teachers and guides are always with you and giving you help, but sometimes you need more.

If a therapist is not possible, look for some other wise counselor you can trust – possibly someone in your church if you belong to a religion, or possibly even a relative or friend. If no counselor is available then you can be your own therapist, and I will make some suggestions about how to do that. And for many of you this will work well. But if you have a mental or emotional disorder, you probably need skilled help in dealing with your issues and the emotions that go with them, and it is advisable for you to use caution if you try the exercises I offer here.

Now, if you are working on your own, perhaps the best thing to do first is to practice being present with yourself. This is absolutely important. Take time to be with yourself. Every day, sit with yourself as you would sit with a good friend who is in pain. Sit. Be there. Do not judge. Let go of any expectations. Watch what is happening within you with compassion. Breathe And again, be there.

This may take some practice. So often in a situation like yours, you have the urge to escape the unwanted feelings, or to try to fix things, or to judge yourself as weak or incompetent because you have not been able to fix things, and so on. But the practice is important. Just stay with yourself and have the feelings. Doing this consistently, you begin to realize that you are not alone. You are with you. No matter what. No matter how negative the feelings or the situation, and no matter what anyone else does. You are with you.

Whatever the “stories” or fears or loneliness – or perhaps also feelings of anger and sorrow – you are there with you. Just by doing this, your being present and accepting, some of the emotions you feel trapped in may come “unstuck” and move. When that happens, continue to be present, and let them be. After doing this, it can often be very helpful to write down some of your experiences. But don’t focus too much on the writing and be drawn into an overly mental approach. It is the emotions you want to encourage. Be there with them.

Now, to strengthen your work I always recommend when dealing with emotions that you invite your body to take part. First notice all the physical aspects that come up when you feel feelings: tears, tightness in your throat, your chest, your abdomen, your limbs, or anywhere else, changes in breath and heartbeat, and so on. These all bring you messages, and you may already know well what they are saying. If not, ask them. And listen. Either immediately or eventually, you will get an impression, or another sensation, or an image, or even a word or two that comes into your mind.. Again, don’t push, just be there and receive it.

The next step will also involve your body, and that is to let it move. Find a place where you can be alone and private. Imagine the feelings -- fear, loneliness, and so on --flowing into your whole body and beginning to move it, in motion that may be graceful or forceful, fast or slow. And let that happen. Let your body move and let your feelings guide your movements. If sounds or words come, allow them also.

If you find it difficult to get started with this process, you can “warm up” this way. Say ”No!” or “No I won’t!” in a strong tone, and at the same time, pound your fist on a soft surface, or stamp your foot. And breathe. You can do this for a time if you need to prime the pump to get your energy to flow. Simply be with the experience and notice what happens. Your body will guide you if you let it. (By the way, to do this exercise, at the start, you don’t have to know what you are saying “no” to, although sooner or later a situation where you have wanted to say no will probably pop into your mind.)

Now, when you put these suggestions of mine into practice, on a regular basis, you may gradually notice changes in yourself in how you feel. A feeling of pain, for example, may transform into anger, or then into sadness, and then into a kind of peace. Just keep following and being present. And for a while, practice this often, even every day. Be consistent, but also give yourself permission to sometimes take a break. This can be hard work and you sometimes need some time off.

I will not lay out a program here as to what "should" happen next for you if you do this practice, because if you simply stay with it, you will discover that for yourself – which is much better. But I guarantee that if you are able to be faithful about carrying out these suggestions, you will change and your life will change, for the better. You will find and enjoy the beauty that is in you and the beauty that is all around you.

And remember, we have great compassion for you always.



P.S. Please also read my letter to Gitte (9-24-11) and to M.B. (November 2013). You and M.B. especially share many similarities and what I say to her applies to you.

November 2013

my greeting to master Vywamus

I would like to know the most suitable way to access my divine power
so that I can fulfill my dream at this moment in time


Dear T.T.,

First, I always recommend meditation, or creative work, yoga, tai chi, and so on – any practice that helps you be present and immersed in the higher energies of spirit. And then, work at allowing those higher energies into your body and into your everyday life and all that you do there. Every day, in the midst of your daily activities, remind yourself often of the higher energies that are working through you -- even in the most mundane situations (standing in line, driving, etc.) To come to and live in this dual consciousness is the basic and primary purpose in life for everyone at this time in your evolution. So you will hear me recommending this over and over to everyone who writes in to this page.

Now, if you have a particular dream, it is probably one of your secondary life purposes. And for moving this purpose along, again, start by going to the higher levels of yourself. That is where the roots of all your purposes come into being. The more you allow the energy of spirit into your everyday life, the more it will effortlessly channel itself through you and into the secondary purposes of your life – including your dream. In the process it will bring opportunities to your attention, and will move your dream to fulfillment if it is possible in this reality. And, the spiritual energies may at the same time transform the form of your dream from how you see it now to a form that is even more in line with your own spiritual path. Your job is to stay in contact with the higher energies and let them work through you. And in the process, you will have many chances to use your own individual ideas and unique creativity.

Along the way you will probably encounter in yourself some mental and emotional blocks that you have built up in this and in other lives. Working with these is not a detour on you spiritual path, but part of it., and it will help your dream come into being. I have outlined ways to work with these seeming “blocks” in many of my letters on this ASK VYWAMUS page, so do go over previous letters if you need help with this process. I suggest especially my response to Wendy (July 2013) and to L.J. (November 2013) .

For more information on how the current world environment may relate to the outcome of your working toward your dream, see also my letter to Sandy (November, 2013) . This letter is very relevant to you also.

Finally, I want to assure you that we masters and guides are with you with our love and support always. Call on us in dreams and in the waking state.

We love you,


November 2013

(Dear Vywamus,)

how to stop negative feelings, self-sabatoge, find a true, joyful love and accept it and know you are both truly right for each other


Dear M.B,

Thank you for writing in with your double question about dealing with negative feelings and finding the right partner to love. And I see that you are quite aware of how these two issues are linked.

So first, I would like you to read what I wrote this month to Gold (November 2013). In some ways you and she have a very similar soul path, and I could just as easily have written her letter, verbatim, to you as a response to your first question. It is meant for you also. So do read and carry out the suggestions I have given her.

If you want a good relationship with someone, it is absolutely crucial to do the work I’ve described in that letter. If you haven’t learned and practiced being present with yourself and accepting of yourself, then it is very hard to let in, and really feel, love from anyone else. And so you will feel constantly needy, and be constantly trying harder to get more love and approval from the other person -- when you aren’t even receiving the love and care they might already be giving you. You can see that this would be a real obstacle to finding and keeping a true partner. Or even a true friend.

So do that work, in your case, simply being present with the negative feelings and the inclination to self-sabotage, as I have laid it out in Gold’s letter. In the process, you may learn a great deal about different parts of you that are in conflict with each other, and what they need before the conflict can be resolved.

When you have done that practice for a time, you will begin to really feel that you are there for you – whatever anyone else does. At the deepest level, your happiness is not totally dependent on anyone else – because you will always have you. This is a very positive step in changing your old pattern and attracting and recognizing a joyful match where there is love, equality, respect, and interdependence (as opposed to dependence.)

Do that inner work until you feel a shift happening within yourself, then follow the usual common sense recommendations. Be out in the world, engage in activities you enjoy, go on the internet, be open to meeting someone who fits in with your new way of being.

Then, when you do meet someone, stay balanced. Don’t drop the practice of sitting with yourself and being present. If you are tempted to go back to your old pattern and depend on the new person for your emotional income, it’s definitely a time to step up the practice of being present with yourself, being present with all your feelings, and even present with the urge to go back into your old pattern. Just watch all that happening within yourself, but also pay attention to the new patterns of being present with yourself that you have established. How would the relationship look if you could stay present with yourself and be with the other person?

Practice being with yourself while in the presence of the new person. If you can do this, you may form a new kind of relationship, a very satisfying one where you are not always needy and you feel cared for as the person you are. On the other hand, if you find it is constantly a problem for you to be your real self with the new person, it may be that he or she is not a good fit with the new you you have grown into, and that someone else may be a better match for you. If this is hard to face, you may want to consult someone before you make a choice, but whatever you do, remember: You are not alone, ever. You always have you.

And you have us too, of course. We know it is sometimes not very easy to be human. We are always with you, giving you our support.


November 2013

(Dear Vywamus,)

Why am I feeling so unmotivated?


Dear L.J.,

Feeling unmotivated is a phase many of you go through at different times in your lives, and it usually means a transition is happening. And at this time in human evolution, many of you are in transition. Perhaps the things you used to be interested in and passionate about no longer seem important, and you have not yet found anything new to engage you. Or perhaps you have never found a purpose to be passionate about. To any of you who are in one of these phases, I say: Look first to your body and your emotions as guides.

Your physical energy may be low, or bound up in some way so that the bodily energies cannot support any kind of enthusiasm or urge to be active. It is important, and just common sense, to first check out and treat any medical condition that may be depleting your energy flow. (e.g., low thyroid, sleep disorder, chemical imbalance resulting in depression, and so on). Do this first, and you may need nothing else.

Often, however there is an emotional reason for feeling unmotivated – whether or not you also have a physical cause. So look at your emotions. There is likely some war going on inside yourself between the parts of you that want to move forward and the parts of you that are resisting. So the result is a stalemate, or stuckness. And sometimes all emotions “go underground” so that you are not even consciously aware of the conflict. And then life seems very flat indeed.

The solution, of course, is to bring those emotions up to your awareness again, and to fully feel all of them. It’s often easier and quicker if you do this work with the help of a therapist or other wise counselor. Whether you do this work with a counselor or by yourself, it is important to give all the parts of you a hearing. Find a private and secure place where you can let out and express your feelings in a physical way. If you would like more detailed suggestions on how to do this, look at my letter this month to Gold (November 2013).

As you do this work, honor all the feelings that come up from the different parts of you. Do not try to get rid of them. They all have something to contribute. Listen to their messages. It will gradually become clearer to you as to what the stalemate is, and then you can ask those parts of you how it can be resolved. If you are consistent in staying with this process, the energies in your emotional field will begin to come together. Instead of making war, they will get together to power your will and enthusiasm toward a goal that you can become excited about.

Now what about your mind? The role of your mind is to bring up good ideas and possible goals, and help you explore their practicality, but your mind alone can almost never be certain which goal is most right for you, and your mind alone can never give you true motivation. Motivation is the sphere of the emotions. Liberate them, listen to them, guide them with whatever wisdom you have achieved, and you will find that you are feeling alive and ready to move in whatever direction you need to go.

For more about how to work with and benefit from emotions, see also my letters to H. Kim (5-21-10) and Anthony (Nov. 2012).

Thank you for your question, and especially during this transition, call on us for help any time.

We are always available,


November 2013

Beloved Vywamus;

I have been led to the world of healing in response to my longtime plea for my life's purpose.

I took my training a year and a half ago and despite many efforts/ attempts and failures I am still trying to figure out how to get my business started. WHY ?

Thank you Vywamus for your Divine Intervention,


Dear Sandy,

Right now there are many people who have skills and training, who want to be of service in the world, and who are having problems similar to yours. This applies to those of you who are moved to work in healing, and also in the arts, and to those who wish to aid others in their spiritual and emotional evolution.

First, I suggest you and others who are experiencing similar difficulties in finding a form where you can bring your service to the world read over my responses to Michael (12-17-11), Wanda (2-25-13), and Wendy (7-17-13). What I say there very much applies to you. In these responses I give suggestions on how to remove blocks and let the higher energies flow into your life to enliven your purpose and guide you toward its manifestation. Just doing this may be helpful enough that you need do nothing else.

Now, suppose you’ve read those suggestions and even carried them out as best you can, and you still haven’t been able to get your business started? In that case, there are some further perspectives I would like to give you and others like you about your situation. First of all, many of you who are called to service in healing, in the arts, and in spiritual work are older souls who have had other lives in which, as a younger soul, you were wealthy and successful and had many material comforts and possessions. Every soul on its spiritual path goes through the learnings that being rich and successful may bring.

Usually after several such lives your higher self moves on to other experiences in which material success is not the focus. This doesn’t mean you live in poverty necessarily, but that how you make your living and how many material rewards come your way are no longer a main point of your life. So, as an older soul, whatever your occupation, your purpose in this life is not likely to be getting rich or famous. That is no longer a measure of success for you. It may happen that you have that kind of material success, but that is not as likely as if you were a younger soul whose purpose is to learn about having wealth.

There is another aspect of your situation to note also. In deciding to be born into this moment of space/time, this reality, you have entered a culture and economy undergoing some stress and change. In these circumstances, many people are contracting to what they see as “basics” for survival, and are less inclined to focus on and spend time and money on the arts, on healing, and on spiritual learning, as they would otherwise do if the culture and economy were in a more expansive phase.

It is certainly not that healing, arts, and spirit are at any time less necessary to people – they are what give meaning and value to life. It is only that many people are fearful and cutting back to basic necessities and perceive these important human experiences to be “luxuries” they can’t afford. Moreover, many of the old forms in your society are breaking down, so that some of the ways that used to work to bring you material success no longer work so well.

What to do, then? Here you are, in a culture and economy that greatly needs your service, but is not as receptive to paying for it as they might have been in the past.

First, let me emphasize this point: Your true vocation, that to which you are called in this life, is not always the same as the way you make your living. In times like these the economy often does not support your fully making a living at what you came here to do. Yet you are still needed to do it. So if you have to temporarily take another job to pay the bills, the world still needs you to do your healing, your art, or your spiritual work. You may need to take another job, even if it seems unrelated to your main life purpose -- but if you possibly can, do keep up your healing practice, or art or other work part time, whether or not you are making much, or any, money at it. And, keep letting yourself be known for what you do. Your part time practice may then expand eventually into full time – or not. But you will still be fulfilling your life purpose.

Now suppose you are in this part time practice of your service and working elsewhere to make the bulk of your living. Are those wasted hours in that job, except for the money you make? Not at all! If you are in such a situation, your higher self may well have intentionally positioned you there as a bridge for people in the mainstream who might otherwise never have come into contact with the energies of spirit, of healing, or of creativity that you bring to their environment.

Just by being there, even if you don’t tell them of your work, your art, etc., you are generating energies to them that are much needed in that workplace. And if/when you allow them to learn about your healing (or creative or spiritual) work, you may be a powerful influence on them in their evolving, in their opening up to the higher healing, creative, and spiritual energies in themselves.

This is how it is meant to be, that you are bridges and teachers for each other. There are many of you doing that today, and we appreciate you. It also is true that as such a bridge you have the best chance of eventually building a full time practice for yourself, or at least increasing the hours you spend in the particular service you are drawn to. But don’t forget, wherever you are, you can serve, and indeed, are called to serve. And that we love and support you in it.

With love and care,



Dear Vywamus,

I am stuck at such a deepl leve and so full of pain it is hard to live- Having had a number of accidents I have become extremely sensitive and take in far too many energies. I hava a strong dfeeling that despite all the accidents, i could be doing much better, feeling at ease and in ove with life again. What do i need to do to get clear again and flow with life in the beauty I know there is?
Thank you

 Dear Li,

This is indeed a difficult challenge that you have undertaken, and you and others who are in a similar situation to yours have our love and support, always. I will be speaking in general here, so take whatever resonates with you personally and let the rest go for now.

First, of course, on the practical side, I am assuming you have already explored many avenues for helping your body, including possibly conventional medicine, alternative medicine, chiropractic, acupuncture, massage, energy healing, EFT, diet, and exercise. I hope you do not rule out the ease that judicious medication or herbal treatments can bring you. Hypnosis and EEG training can also be helpful if you still need pain control. I am sure you have already tried many of these avenues I have mentioned, but if possible try any that you have overlooked. Not only may it be a support for you if you should find a caring and skilled practitioner with good energy in one of these fields, you are also showing your body how much you care and want to help. So on the practical level, do all you can, and then accept the reality of your situation at present -- always being aware that from the present moment, more change and healing is possible.

Now, what you are really asking about here, I understand, is not so much about the physical side, but what to do about the injuries to your emotional energy body. And as you say, how to get back your joy in living. For anyone, after accidents or injuries, it’s likely that you should feel physically and psychologically raw and vulnerable, and possibly more open to the negative energies around you as well, which may bring you down still farther. You could call what you go through a form of Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. In addition to the stress and fatigue from physical pain, you may have a fear.

of being hurt, and a tendency to want to retreat into a “safe” place and not engage with the world as you have in the past. Though you may actually now be in a physically safe situation, your emotional and bodily aspects are damped down and in retreat. This is a natural phase of healing, and should be given some time. Now you are feeling more ready to move on to the next phase, and I have some suggestions for you.

But! -- before going through the steps I will outline to help you move into the next phase, first you must surrender to what is. Stop fighting. Accept where you are, as genuinely and wholeheartedly as you can. Accept your bodily problems, accept your feelings, accept that you want to do everything you can to help yourself, accept everything in your current situation. Even accept that you don’t want to accept everything. I know this may not be easy, but as you continue to practice this acceptance as best you can, it will bring you great peace. Then go on to some of the steps below.

First, as I always recommend, spend as much time as you can in the states of higher consciousness, whether you get there by meditation or in other ways. This is such a healing and generative place that even moments there have a great effect. So go there as often as you can, and when you come back from there you will be better able to work with your everyday self and your situation in everyday life. Whether or not you do this, your problem of feeling shut down and lacking in joy may shift or gradually go away on its own, with time. But it may not, if there is a life lesson for you to learn here first. So if that is the case, I have some further recommendations for you.

Whenever something is going on with the emotions and/or the body, I always urge you to hold some inner conversations with the parts of you that are having trouble. It does not work to try to rise above or ignore or try to get rid of your inner distress until you have fully understood and brought love to it. Talk to your body, and also to the emotional parts of you that feel afraid or unwilling to engage with the world as before. And of course, also listen to them. Ask how they are doing and also ask what they need, and then ask what would have to happen for them to be fully alive again, and even joyful. Then see if there are some life circumstances you can change in line with their suggestions. That is a good beginning. As you do this you are already preparing the way for reversing your retreat.

While doing this work you may well come across some limiting beliefs you are holding. Pay attention to them. One of them could be, “I won’t know how to experience joy again until I am physically and emotionally recovered from my accident.” This is a belief, not a statement of actual reality. Let me remind you that many mystics and saints, and ordinary people too, have endured great physical, mental, and emotional suffering, and yet have been able, in the midst of their sufferings, to be in love with life. And what one human can do, you can do. So if you are aware of holding this limiting belief, or any others that come up, I suggest you do some work to transform them, using some of the ways I have outlined to Wendy in my letter of 7-23-13 on this page.

Now in addition to doing this work to help yourself, it seems to me you need a jump start. So first, look at what in the world has brought you comfort, nurturance, joy, and good feelings. What do you love? From sensory experiences as small as having a hot shower or listening to music, or looking at something beautiful, to spending time with people you love who can nurture you and laugh with you, to being out in nature -- whatever you love, or have loved in the past, or might love in the future, make the effort to flood yourself with it. Do this even if your response to these things is temporarily less than before. Be patient. You may suddenly find yourself looking at a rose with all the wonder and joy you had before.

Try also to find some kind of gentle movement you can do (yoga, dancing, etc.) which will help your bodily energies flow. While allowing this flow, especially focus on your heart, your solar plexus, your gut, your pelvis. These are likely places where your emotional energies are shut down. You don’t have to be very vigorous here unless you want to. A little attention and intention to allow the flow there will be enough.

In working with the body and the emotions, old issues from this and other lives may come up and give you the opportunity to look at and resolve them. Sometimes you can resolve them simply by bringing them to light, or by having inner conversations with the parts of you that are involved. Or, you may decide to get the help of a trusted counselor. Remember, none of these issues are in the way but are part of your path. They’re part of what you came here to do – and to help others to do.

Finally, in addition to visiting the levels of higher consciousness often, it will be helpful if you engage in a creative project, large or small, or some other activity you love, in the everyday world. Both these activities immerse you in the higher energies, which is good for the cells of your body and your entire energy field.

You have an important spiritual mission right now -- to learn how to accept your accidents, their results, and your emotions in your everyday life situation, and at the same time, to begin to live more and more in the higher levels of your soul consciousness. This is part of what you came here to do. And if you are willing, it is also your mission to help others who are in a similar situation to do the same.

All this does not mean you have to remain in your current physical and emotional state for the rest of your life. But for now, take what practical steps you can, and then accept what is the reality for now, and bring light to it. Accomplishing this will help your soul’s awakening, and will be one of your personal contributions to the great treasury of humanity’s learning. And as you move forward, having been through the fire, you will be able to flow with life in beauty, at a new level that you have not reached before in this physical life.

We guides at my level live in joy, and we invite you to join us there for as much time as you would like to spend. Reach out and take our hands. Here there is no pain, no fear, only full aliveness, and here is where the core of you deep down always lives, is always all right, is always in joy. It takes only a moment for you to come to this core and be in that joy.




Dear Vywamus,

How do we over come doubt?

 Dear Wendy,

The best way is to change your relationship to doubt. So here I will focus on how you may do that.

The first thing to know and remember is: Doubt is a learning tool. So are fear, anger, pain, confusion, and many other states that you might consider “negative.”

If you could always be in the higher state of consciousness that you reach in meditation (or in other ways, including creative work and healing, and doing an activity that you love), then you would not experience doubt or any of these other “negative” states. There you are in a state of oneness with all the energies of Being. There doubt and these other states simply do not exist, since they are based not on oneness, but on your perception of separateness and limitation. So to begin with, I suggest that you meditate or engage in these other activities so as to spend as much time as possible in those higher states where doubt is not even an issue.

As a human in your current phase of evolution, however, it is not likely, at least at first, that you will be able to maintain your presence at these higher consciousness evels 24 hours a day. So at times when you are not able to do so, and your consciousness is at your personal “everyday” level, that is when doubt, and fear, pain, anger and other negative experiences become learning tools for you.

It is helpful to look at doubt, or any other negative mental/emotional states as offering lessons and opportunities for your growth and self understanding. They are not detours on your path, to be got rid of, or gotten over with. Rather they are part of your path. So do embrace them, or at least be open to what they have to bring you, whether or not you are enjoying the lesson. Be sure that if there is a lesson for you to learn at this time on your path, certain issues will keep coming up, in one form or another, until you have completed the learning. So you might as well go on with the process and see what happens.

Let’s take doubt, for instance. Here are some steps I suggest for your learning process regarding doubt. First, express your doubt in a sentence. (Example: “I doubt I can be successful in my work.”) Now dig deeper. What are the beliefs you have that underlie this doubt? It’s very individual, but 2 common underlying general beliefs people have are “I don’t feel worthy to be successful,” and/or “The world is not a place that will support my success.”

Make a list of all your own underlying beliefs that you find coming up. These are thought forms that may play and replay in many situations of your life, and as you think them, you will also notice that they are accompanied by feelings. If for example, you see yourself as unworthy, you may be feeling inadequate, and be angry with yourself for your inadequacy. If you see the world as not supporting you, you are clearly feeling mistrustful of the world and of the people around you. When having these feelings, notice also any changes in your body-- possibly a drooping of your shoulders, a feeling of tiredness, and so on.

You have begun by identifying your underlying limiting beliefs, and the emotions and bodily feelings that go with them. Now, it is possible for you to transform a limiting belief into a belief that you would rather have. Take each belief on your list, and write down next to it what belief you would like to have instead. For example, next to “I am not worthy of success’” you might write, “I deserve to be rewarded for my efforts.” Say that positive belief out loud and notice the emotions and bodily feelings that go with it. You may feel encouraged or empowered, and your body may respond by straightening your back, or in other ways. Or, maybe you find it hard to entertain the new belief. That is very common at first.

At this point, I always recommend an inner conversation with the limiting belief you have held for so long. Ask it why it came to be and what it has been doing for you all this time. You can be sure it would not have persisted if you did not get some benefit from it. Maybe a number of benefits. So listen inwardly for its answer. Your limiting belief might answer, for example, “Believing you are unworthy has often kept you from taking the risk of trying for something. And if you don’t try, you can’t fail. So, I have kept you from failing.” (Or, it may be some other benefit it’s brought you.) Now, even though you find this limiting belief is no longer helpful, it is important to accept that in its own limited/limiting way, it has been working for your welfare. So acknowledge the benefit(s) it has brought you, and thank it.

The next step in this inner conversation is to ask the old limiting belief the key question, “What would have to happen for you to transform into the belief that I would rather have?” From here on, you can continue the dialog, and work out together how this change can be achieved and brought into reality in your everyday life. Throughout this inner conversation, it is important to pay attention to your emotions and your body. It may be your mind that suggests a good plan and says, “This is how it should be,” but you need to sense it in your heart or in your gut to feel convinced that “Yes, this is right.”

If you are not used to focusing inward in this way, it may take some time and patience before you get the conversation going and get clear answers to the questions you ask inwardly. With practice, however, anyone can develop this skill, and it is well worth putting in the time and effort. Learning this kind of inner dialog brings many rewards, the first of which is that you learn a great deal about yourself. And in dealing with life challenges, having an inner dialog with various aspects of yourself can be a major help in making decisions, solving practical problems, and coming into a state of inner peace and harmony. Finally, this kind of inner conversation is extremely helpful in removing blocks in your energy flow that may be holding you back from actually creating the physical reality around you that you desire.

The suggestions I have offered here are enough to help you get started in working with and transforming your limiting beliefs, and as a result, transforming both your internal and your external realities. If you would like to know more, I have given detailed guidance on transforming limiting beliefs to create new realities in Chapters 22 through 24 of my book The Next Big Bang.

Now, as you take my suggestions in this letter, you will be moving along on your path and will be having many inner adventures. As you go along, you will find a balance between spending time in that aspect of yourself that is most in touch with the higher energies of consciousness, and working at the everyday level on your limiting beliefs. Time spent in one mode will help you evolve in the other as well, removing blocks, strengthening the energy flow, and so on. And we guides will be with you always to lend our energy and our support when you need it , and to celebrate with you as you go through the important passages of your life.





I have a serious question. How can i protect myself from the personal psychic and astral attacks from the dark brotherhood. Why is this happening to me know and how can i overcome this in safety.

Thank you sincerly,

Can you please post this anonymous?

Dear Anonymous,

I will answer this at some length, since I know there are others who are struggling with some of the same issues. If you have tried some of my suggestions here already, feel free to try them again, or skip over some and find what most resonates with you.

First of all, when you feel yourself under attack from darker energies, whether you perceive the attack as coming from within yourself or from “outside,” remember that even darker or negative energies are simply energy. Energy is neutral in its essence, and it is the particular patterning of energy that makes it good or bad energy in your perspective. Patterns can be altered or canceled out and transformed. They depend on your personal and collective human beliefs and emotions to keep them going – or to change them.

Now before doing anything – and this is always my recommendation, not just in this situation, but when any challenge or negativity comes into your life – it is always best to go to your soul level, into the core of yourself, to the level where you are one with the Infinite, and where you are always all right, always perfect, and can never be harmed. You may be doing this through meditation or some other way. Spend time there. Here you can get an awareness and a true knowing that any threat you perceive has no real power to affect you. In fact, here nothing can come at you from outside, because here there is no ”outside.”

Ideally, being in this Infinite space would be all you need to do. If you are able to live always in this space, nothing can harm you and you know it. But let’s suppose that you, like most people, can’t consciously stay in that Infinite space 24 hours a day. Still you can shuttle back and forth between this larger Place and your everyday reality. Do go there as often as you can. When you come back to the everyday, you may find that you have a different perspective on the problem you have been struggling with. And then there are other steps you can take in your everyday reality.

First, before you take any action, ask yourself what you have learned so far from having this problem? What qualities and emotions and beliefs are being called up in yourself to be looked at and possibly transformed? At the higher level of yourself, you have called this experience to you for some reason. What may you learn from it? Learning fully the lesson presented is a key to moving through the particular negative phase in which you find yourself. And to moving on. These are questions to look at using the intelligence and emotions of your personal, “everyday” self, and also questions to bring into the deeper Infinite space where you go in meditation, so as to get a broader perspective on them.

Now, back in your everyday reality, while you are exploring the lessons this situation is bringing you, you may in the meantime still feel the need to defend yourself against the attacks you are reporting. You may be inspired to try defensive measures others have used. There are many helpful books and web sites you can find which will suggest ways to defend yourself from negative energies, or even simply to defend yourself from having your energy drained away by needy souls. The suggestions generally include measures such as setting up guards and boundaries of light around yourself, or invoking a higher level guide as a protector. You may find it useful , for example, to visualize myself and/or other higher level teachers and guides at your side to help you, and when you experience negative energies coming at you, simply turn them over to us. Your policy should be to stand your ground and meet them at your boundary, but do not engage with them. 

Redirect them or deflect them toward us. We will take charge of them. Just trust us to do so.

These methods of defending yourself can be helpful, and do explore as many of them as you are drawn to. But it’s sometimes a little tricky using them. You may well find that if you give a lot of thought and emotion and energy to defending yourself, you are, by doing so, also giving a lot of thought, emotion and energy to that which you are defending yourself against. So do not give your energy to your idea of a “dark brotherhood,” or to any other force you perceive as coming against you. The best thing to do with any of these defensive measures is to “set it and forget it.”

Having spent time in Infinite space, having done the work of finding out what you need to learn, and then having given the “defense” over to us, now, here is a final crucial step: find ways to fill up your entire energy field with light, and so fully occupy it that there is no way for other forces to get in. What do you love? What do you feel passionate about? Find something you love, and follow it. Whether it is a pastime, or a form of meditation that gives you blissful feelings, or a creative expression of yourself, or an activity you find fulfilling or feel is related to your life purpose --focus on that. Be with what you love. Focus on filling up your energy field with love and the activities that bring you joy, so there is no room for anything “darker.” Practice in keeping this focus will help you stay in this state most of the time.

After that, if you still find the problem arising from time to time, it probably means there is more to learn before you move on. If you have more thoughts and feelings about being attacked, observe them as they arise and be open to what else you may need to learn. For instance, is there something within you that resonates with the experience of feeling attacked? Sometimes there are buried aspects of yourself which eventually burst out or leak out, and if you haven’t acknowledged or known about these forces inside you, you may interpret it as an attack from outside. At other times an attack may more clearly seem to come from outside. But even in the latter case, there is often something angry, or fearful, or depressed, or guilty within you that may be attracting an attack from outside, attracting other souls who have negative energies that resonate with yours. They then come to feed on your negative energies, and in other ways to work out their own issues on you. And you feel attacked.

Now of course any anger, depression, fear, guilt, unworthiness, and so on, that you may be holding within yourself could well be the result of actual experiences of being neglected, victimized, and abused that you may have had in this or other lives. Or, the feelings may be the result of your own actions, if you have buried and ignored your natural human needs for belonging and connection, or for accomplishment and competence, or for growth, creativity and adventure.

As long as you harbor these feelings and do not take action to resolve them, you are likely to continue to have experiences of being neglected or victimized in some form – sometimes including the experience of astral or psychic attack – until the lesson you need is learned. For some of you, deep work on yourself is required to move through these deep rooted beliefs and emotions, and it will be good, if possible, to work with a wise counselor who can help you to recognize and work with the issues.

So, how to look at all this? The experiences you describe may happen to anyone at a given point on your path, and in our view, such experience is not a “bad” thing. Do not see it that way. Rather, take it as a signal that you are about to enter a new phase of your spiritual growth, and these experiences are a testing that is pushing you into a passage you need to go through at this time, in order to move into the new phase. You could say it is a mark of progress that you have gotten as far as this set of problems! And I assure you that if you confront them rather than retreat from them, you will make positive progress on your path. As you read all this, you see that it does require work on your part. But if you are open to it, it can be joyful work and rewarding at every step.

We are with you always on this path.




(Dear Vywamus)

Is there a relationship between my Obsessive Compulsive Disorder and mediunity ? How do I know I´m channeling and not going mad ?

Dear Seeker,

The only thing that channeling has in common with Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) or with certain mental disorders is that thoughts may come into your mind which appear to come from other than your normal everyday self. But there the resemblance ends. If you channel with a higher level guide, or your own higher self, the thoughts that come to you will be from a higher level spiritual dimension. The content is supportive and uplifting, and the process will be under your control and not in conflict with your personal ethics or your personal feeling of wellbeing.

In contrast, as you probably know, OCD is most typically characterized by obsessive thoughts and compulsions to action, and usually these are not uplifting and may be distressing. Also, without medication, it is usually difficult to “turn them off.” The situation may be made even more confusing if you have a certain amount of natural psychic talent. How are you to make sense of all this?

First, as I always advise, if you have OCD or any other disorder, make the best use of what practitioners have to offer – in this case, those in the fields of medicine and psychology. This is common sense. There are some brain imbalances your science has just recently begun to discover and treat, imbalances which predispose you to OCD or other disorders. 

So far your practitioners have been able to correct these imbalances to some extent with medications and cognitive therapy, though this approach is not perfect, often requires many adjustments, and may not work for everyone. In future you will see evolving better, more targeted treatments to normalize brain imbalances without medication. Meanwhile, explore and patiently work with what this approach can do for you, so that if you want to channel or use your psychic ability, the brain imbalances will not get in the way.

If you wish to channel, I advise you and everyone, it is important to make contact with a higher level guide who is of the light. This guide may be your own higher Self or some other higher being. Get to know your guide until you develop a level of trust. Opening to Channel by Sanaya Roman is a book that can take you step by step through this process if you don’t already have a process of your own. And if you haven’t already, do read my suggestions in Guidelines for Further Opening to Spirit and Receiving Higher Guidance, which I have posted on this web site on the News page.

In your particular situation, when you channel it is important to ask that only the highest guidance come to you and that you be given help to discern when you are channeling the higher energies and when you are being affected by brain imbalances. (Keep in mind, channeling from the higher levels is voluntary and uplifting, and you should not experience it as something that brings you unpleasant feelings or something you are compelled to do and cannot turn off.) With practice you will develop your own inner yardstick as to when you are channeling the higher energies and when your brain imbalances – or your emotional issues – are affecting your consciousness and your mental clarity.

Channeling is a natural ability that everyone has and can develop. As opposed to “going mad,” channeling with a higher level guide helps you become more and more “sane,” more compassionate, wiser, more expanded, more empowered, more secure in your sense of self, and more able to live easily in your home reality. However, if you are starting to channel, it is important to be at a certain stage of readiness. For those of you who are on a path where you are still developing a secure sense of self in the world, and learning your boundaries and your center in everyday reality, I strongly recommend that you complete that work first, before you begin to work with the sometimes very powerful higher energies that channeling can bring in.

Finally, I hope you don’t consider your OCD (or any other disorder) to be a detour on your spiritual path. It is part of it. You are dealt this hand and this set of circumstances simply because it’s a task you agreed to take on before this life, to contribute to the learning of your own soul and of humanity in general. This is not to say you must experience this condition in this form for this entire lifetime. But for now, you are needed, to face and creatively work with this particular set of circumstances that you are given, including your particular body, your particular brain, your particular life situation, and so on, and within all those circumstances, to find your own ways of connecting to the higher energies and fulfilling your life’s purposes. We thank you for taking this on, and never forget that this is all a very important gift you are making to humanity and to the world. And know that we are always with you.

Thank you,



Dear Vywamus,
I was wondering if you could please tell me if I have taken my first initiation yet,
And if so, how can I advance quicker along the next one?
If you can’t tell me, what signs should I look for, as I’m needing help.
Thank You,
Love, Justin

Dear Justin,

Hard to say which is the first initiation, there are so many. But here we can give you and other readers some more information about initiations in general, so that you may discover for yourselves where you are as regards initiations.

First, I would emphasize that you have minor initiations and passages all the time, and closer together the more you open up to them. And the path to a major initiation is to take up every opportunity to meet and move through the minor initiations. These opportunities come up in your path almost every day, in situations that occur right in front of you, put themselves in your path, so to speak. Be looking for them, they are all around. It will help you be more alert to these opportunities if you have a regular spiritual practice such as meditation.

Opportunities for initiation will often come in relation to people you meet or have already met, who become temporary ”teachers” of yours in some lesson you need on your path. Or your life circumstances may change, e.g., losing a job or being promoted, or illness, or a need to relocate, and so on. Various happenings in your day may lead to your needing to confront mental/emotional or bodily issues that you carry around as “baggage,” so as to resolve them and open the way for the next initiation. Even momentary choices that come up (Should I go outdoors?/help this person?/work on a certain project?, etc.) lead to minor passages and minor initiations. Incrementally they change who you are and move you forward on your path.

With a major initiation, you may, in a vision, in a dream, etc., experience a very sudden or very dramatic shift, so that you immediately know you are different and your life will be completely changed. But this is not a common way to have a major initiation. Rather, having gone through some of the many minor passages I have just spoken about, you will at some point look back and realize that you have made a major shift upwards in your life, your perspective, your emotions and so on -- but so gradually that you didn’t perceive it as you went through it. This is the perfectly normal way to go through a major initiation and is the most usual way of doing it. So look back and see if this is the case for you.

Now, if you realize that you have had this kind of more gradual initiation, and your mind or your ego is a bit disappointed that it occurred without great drama and fanfare, be assured that it still works! And that in other lives and other realities, you have, or already had, or will have, that earthshaking initiation experience you imagine and hope for. And meanwhile, we at this level congratulate you on all the passages you have already come through, and we thank you for all your efforts on the earth plane to bring spirit more consciously into your everyday life.

Warmly, Vywamus


Dear Vywamus

Could you shed some light on the Human Design System? Is it in aligment with Divine Truth? And would you recommend to follow this system? With love and gratitude



Dear Flavia,

First, do look over my advice on finding a spiritual teacher, in my letter to Jenn on 2-25-13. Much of what I say there applies just as well to evaluating a particular path or program or method designed to promote your spiritual growth. I am much in favor of your following what your heart and your spirit are drawn to and energized by, and then learning whatever lessons you get from doing so.


If you are drawn to the Human Design System, feel free to explore it and use your own inner wisdom to assess what helpful guidance you are getting from it. Like many other good systems, it is in alignment with Divine Truth, and also like many other good systems, it can only take you so far. When you have learned what you need to learn, you will go beyond needing any system, and indeed at that point trying to cling on to it can hold you back. Meanwhile, enjoy the path!

My best to you,




How do I find a spiritual teacher for channeling and mediumship that will be right for me? How can I really tell if they are authentic and selfless in their intentions in this world? I feel I need a mentor that will aide the Spirits' teachings.

Thank You, Jenn


Dear Jenn,

Your purpose in seeking a teacher is key here. If you are seeking to learn a skill such as channeling, you need only find someone who has the skill and is good at teaching it. Of course, it brings you more joy to have a more evolved teacher, but for this purpose it is not crucial. You will likely find someone offering courses in channeling or mediumship by searching on line, or through ads in publications, or through word of mouth. If you are not in a very populated area, you may find channeling courses on line, or books that teach channeling or mediumship.


My advice to you is to listen to or read some of the content a teacher channels so that you have a chance to see if you resonate with the material they are bringing through. If you feel good about what you hear, find out about the structure of the classes. Does the teacher have a step by step method for assisting you to open your own channel? Is there opportunity for hands on practice and getting feedback? Is attention paid to helping class members deal with issues about channeling, e.g., proper grounding, doubts and fears, self-judging, etc.? If it is an actual class, is there an atmosphere of trust and cooperation rather than of competitiveness? If all this is true, you might find the class quite effective for you regardless of the teacher’s level of evolution.


Now, seeking a teacher to be your mentor and guide on the spiritual path is another thing entirely. Today many are looking for reliable guidance on their spiritual path, and most of you are in a phase where you still need it. Eventually of course you will go beyond needing our help and will be your own spiritual teacher, but in the meantime, you will probably be searching though books, web sites, advertisements, or the recommendations of others, and then taking the first steps of getting to know various teachers through reading or listening to them. How do you know which of them may best be of help to you?


First I would emphasize that this quest for a teacher may be about him or her, but it is also about you. The very quest for a teacher is an occasion for your own growth and learning. So, ironically, my first recommendation is that you begin this quest by studying yourself. 1) Using meditation or whatever other practice works for you, go into the deepest level of yourself – what I call the I AM or soul or core level – and immerse yourself in the energy there. Feel it and know it. Then, listen to, read the words of, or put yourself in the presence of, a particular teacher that you are considering. Go again to your I AM level and ask yourself, “Is this energy of mine at the I AM level enhanced or stirred up when I am with this teacher?” Often you will know right away. If the answer is yes, that teacher probably has something to offer you.


2) Also spend some time just observing yourself and noticing your tendencies to get caught up in your own ego issues , e.g., “I am not enough,” “I am better than/less than this or that person,” “I must be perfect so I can have everyone like me (be a success in life, progress on my spiritual path, etc.)” And so on.


Now bring these self observations of ego issues into the presence of the teacher, whether that is in person or in written words, etc. When you are with the teacher, do you notice any of your own ego issues coming up or intensifying in the teacher’s presence? Own these issues as yours, and observe what triggers them.


3) Also observe the teacher. Does the teacher seem to be caught up in any of the following ego issues? A) “My way is the only, the best, the right way.” B) Making comparisons : better than/less than; flattering or inflating of the teacher’s ego or the student’s ego; C) Domineering or arrogant presence; D) Lack of true kindness and compassion, which should be present even when speaking bluntly and honestly to students. E) Excessive attachment to rules and rituals: “You must follow all these particular steps to get to self realization;” F) Any inclination to demand unquestioning obedience, unreasonable amounts of money, and even sexual favors from students. All these are red flags that you need to observe carefully.


Even if the teacher has a valid connection with spirit that you can feel , and that enhances your own spiritual energies, if he/she still has such ego issues going on, these may seriously get in the way of your being able to benefit from the relationship. If there are only a few or minor ego issues in evidence, it may be less of a problem.


Of course, many students still choose to follow a teacher with deep ego issues, and in doing so they learn a great deal. But if, as you mention, you are looking for someone who is authentic and selfless in intention, then you will need to look further, using the yardsticks I have given you: 1) Does the teacher have a valid connection with spirit that you can feel and that enhances your own? and 2) What do you learn when you observe your own spiritual energies in the teacher’s presence? Your own and the teacher’s ego issues?


Now, it is true that on the planet at this time there are a number of teachers who are fully “awake” and fully evolved, fully realized, who are no longer caught up in issues of ego. You may be fortunate enough to find one of them. Such teachers are humble and unassuming and may not be very well known. Much more often, however, you are likely to encounter a teacher who has much to offer you, and yet who has not fully worked through all his or her own ego issues. In fact, almost every spiritual teacher you can find in the world today will still have some areas they are working on. This does not mean you should pass up what they have to give – just that you need to develop some discernment about what you are receiving from them.


It is helpful for you to keep in mind that most teachers are on a path of learning themselves, and I may add that one of the greatest challenges for many spiritual teachers is to accept and love the pure stream of spiritual energy that comes through them in their work, without getting caught up in taking personal credit for this power, or in the ego inflation that could result from receiving praise, devotion and adulation from students and followers.


A teacher who is still evolving may frequently have a strong connection with the spiritual energies and be able to generate an energy field that calls out to your own spiritual energies to resonate with it, so that you feel uplifted, peaceful, inspired, even ecstatic, in their company. All but the most evolved teachers , however, will occasionally or often fall back into some personality issues when they are not actually working with you at the soul level. It is important for you to be aware of this, and observe it when it happens.


The more advanced of the teachers in this “still learning” category can simply watch and accept their ego issues as they come up, and then move on, as the Buddhists recommend. The less advanced may have blind spots in certain areas, or may even fall into the ego trap of believing all the praise they receive, and considering themselves infallible or above all the rules in all they say and do. This might be confusing to you, but only if you are expecting them to be perfect. Like you, they may have a very deep connection to spirit which they can share – but also may still have personal issues to resolve.


It is good to be aware that there is a whole spectrum of teachers that could be helpful to you, and it’s good for you to learn to recognize where a particular teacher fits on the spectrum. You can certainly learn from teachers at any of these levels, and you will probably be drawn to whatever level of learning you need, depending on where you are on your path right now. And, I would add, have compassion for any “imperfect” teacher you meet. They are facing certain challenges on their own path, and they are learning as you are.


Now, as you look for a teacher, or if you have found one, what kind of relationship is best for you to have with him or her? In the old tradition, it was considered right to surrender your own will to the teacher and be unquestioningly led on a spiritual path by him or her. This worked well as long as the surrender was to the spiritual energies, or some would say the Divine, as embodied by the teacher, and to that extent it still works today. It is always all right and best to surrender and hand yourself over to the higher spiritual energies and be guided by them in all your doings. You are not, however expected to surrender to the personal power of any teacher, only to the higher Power that comes through him or her. So, do surrender to, enjoy, and “be” with the pure spiritual energy you may find in the teacher’s presence, and at the same time, observe his or her human failings and have compassion for them, without getting entangled in them.


As to the question of responsibility, something new is happening today. Humanity is passing into a new stage of evolution, where you are expected to become a partner in designing your spiritual path, and not leave it all up to the teacher. You are not supposed to abandon your own awareness and discernment and hand over everything to the teacher. Tempting as it may sometimes be to be able to let go of all that responsibility, it is no longer your path as a human of today to let any teacher take over responsibility for your life and your choices. (Of course, if you do do that, be assured that you will still learn a great deal!)


Rather, your evolutionary task now is to find and be present to the spiritual energies within yourself, and eventually to become your own spiritual teacher. Of course, this is something new. Something very new. It is taking you beyond where you were before, to a whole new level, and putting much more responsibility on your own shoulders. You may make some errors along the way, as part of your learning. But we at our level, and your own Higher Selves, feel that you, and humanity in general, are ready for this next step. And you have our support all the way.

Our blessings to you,



Dear Vywamus,

 How can we deal with hostility directed at us?

 In light and love, Umesh


Dear Umesh,

This depends on what form(s) the hostility takes. If there is a physical form, e.g., physical violence toward yourself, or verbal/emotional abuse, or behavior that puts your job or your relationship(s) in jeopardy, then the first thing is to take any practical steps you need to protect yourself and keep yourself (or your job or relationships) safe. This may mean going to authorities, or at least, removing yourself from a situation where you may be harmed. Being on a spiritual path does not mean you should allow others to harm you – indeed the reverse is true. It is your responsibility to stand up for yourself as far as possible and not collude with or enable their harming you. This would not be good for you or indeed for them.


Now, besides taking any action you need to keep yourself safe, there are other levels to address. To begin with, having a larger perspective is helpful. You may be aware of something you have done or said to provoke hostility in the other person, so it is important to see that. Also, note whether their hostility is a reasonable reaction to the situation between you, or if, as is often true, it seems way out of proportion.


Whether they are reasonable and justified or not, hostility and anger are always defensive responses, reactions to feeling threatened or feeling hurt. So, the other person is reacting to fear or pain. This might be fear or pain about something you have done or might do to them in this life, it could have to do with other lives where you have done them harm, or, most often of all, it is that you remind them of someone else. Your appearance, or words, or actions, may resemble those of someone who has done them harm, and this may have triggered off an unconscious response that does not really belong to you or to the current situation – or only partially so. It is helpful for you to note this and to note that perhaps only a small part of their hostility has anything to do with you personally. Examine the situation, then, and take responsibility for any part of it that you think is yours, but be wary of taking it all personally.


There are two further steps I would suggest: 1) Picture this person at a younger age. Usually the unconscious hostility you get from a person is related to their own experiences when they were younger. You may be able to picture them as a scared or hurt 2 year old (or 4 year old or 6 year old) who is angrily striking out at you, without knowing what else to do. (Indeed if this hostile person is someone close to you, a friend or family member, you may even know what experiences they had in childhood that would predispose them to act this way.) So whenever an actual situation occurs where the person behaves in a hostile way toward you, see him or her as that younger child who is lashing out in pain or fear, and send them compassion if you can. This does not mean you have to let them harm you. As I often say to others who are in this situation, “Just because you understand why a 4 year old is kicking you in the shins, it does not mean you should let them do it.” With a 4 year old, or in the current situation, you do need to set the appropriate limits.


2) Have a conversation at the soul level. Go to your own higher levels, through meditation or whatever other way you use to get there, and there at the soul level, have a dialogue with their soul. At this level, the person’s Higher Self will always hear you and be open to positive changes in the relationship. Sometimes this is helpful to your relationship in everyday life, and sometimes the hostile person is not enough in touch with their own soul level for this to make any apparent difference. Still, this is good for you to do, and you will have the reassurance of seeing the other dimensions of that relationship.


When you have taken the 2 steps above, you will more easily be able to avoid getting pulled into the trap of a power struggle with the hostile person, but rather be able to detach and objectively (and hopefully compassionately) observe what is happening. If you need to take some kind of action, it can then be from a calmer, more centered, and therefore more powerful place in yourself. Finally, it is likely that you are not the only one this person is directing hostility toward, so it will also be helpful for you to watch what happens as it occurs with others.


Dealing with a hostile person is an important challenge for all of you on a spiritual path. Sometimes the lesson is how to be compassionate with and stand up for and protect yourself – for you are a precious soul of great value, and we wish that you cherish yourself as much as we cherish you. Often the lesson also entails seeing the other person in a broader way, recognizing their own issues, detaching from the entanglements of conflicts with them, and sending them compassion – but without letting yourself be injured. If the other person’s hostility brings out anger, or feelings of vulnerability, and so on, in you, then there is also the opportunity to observe these feelings as they come up, accept them, be compassionate with them, and see what work needs to be done with those feelings.


Thank you for bringing up this issue, it is a great challenge which appears on everyone’s spiritual path at some time. We congratulate you on coming to the place where you have the opportunity to confront it. And you can be sure that we are always around to love and support you, in this and in all steps on your path.